


can't get you out of my mind

by wheeinswolf



Category: Dreamcatcher (Korea Band)
Genre: F/F, Fluff and Angst, when you're in love with you're best friend and think it's unrequited
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-21
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-13 02:33:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28895928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wheeinswolf/pseuds/wheeinswolf
Summary: In moments like this, Siyeon told herself there was more behind Bora's reciprocated tease, that maybe, just maybe, she wasn't the only one with a secret buried deep within her chest and the most unreadable script on tear-splattered pages of her diary.
Relationships: Kim Bora | SuA/Lee Siyeon
Comments: 35
Kudos: 138





	1. one

**Author's Note:**

> this is a fictional story with fictional characters loosely following certain events that may or may not have taken place in reality

Bora came to a halt next to her, the too-big coat Siyeon recognized as her own wrapped over her shoulders, an excited grin aimed at her as she reached for Siyeon’s hand.

“Let’s go together?”

Siyeon would never be able to say no to her, would never want to either. 

In a moment of hesitation, doubt, her eyes searched for Minji’s, searching for that reassurance the oldest would always offer her. The second she set out for her quest the dark eyes found hers, quickly switching between her and Bora, before a soft nod and smile met her after. Siyeon had spent more than enough hours curled up into a small, quivering ball surrounded by nothing but the warmth of Minji’s arms for the older woman to know the subject of Siyeon’s worries and thoughts. The nod did for once not help quieten the storm within her, barely even calming it down the tiniest fraction. But it had somehow managed to bring her breathing back to normal before she managed to panic too much. At least that’s what she tried to tell herself even as her heart pounded louder the longer Bora’s small fingers stayed wrapped around hers.

“Alright, let’s go kids!” 

Minji’s voice as always commanded their attention, her clap causing the 7 friends to stand up in near unison and slowly walk towards their dorm’s exit, more or less ready for whatever the day and following scheduled interview would bring. The slightest remain of unease still coursed through Siyeon’s veins even as she squeezed Bora’s hand, trying to find comfort in her presence.

It really was a paradox that would never fail to bring Siyeon to laughter, the one bringing her so many worries simultaneously was the only one capable of quieting them all within seconds.

She shook her head, not quite wanting to spend another evening lamenting over the same story coursing through her head for what by now must be half a decade.

Minji brushed past her and she felt the whisper of a touch on her shoulder, the leader showing silent support and comfort. Siyeon wanted nothing more than to sink into her hug and hide away from everything, Bora's presence most of all. She breathed in through her nose and steeled her eyes on the space ahead of her. Just another day. It was just another day. She’d do just fine, had for the past five years.

Things rarely go as expected. Or maybe this once they did go exactly as expected, the odd feeling in her stomach already having warned her the moment she had woken up.

By the time they reached the room for the interview about all the things that could go wrong already had. They were late by about an hour thanks to a wrong turn leading them first out of the city and then upon return into the worst traffic she had experienced in a while and thus had close to no time left to prepare in any way possible. Yubin’s microphone seemed to have died that exact day and Yoohyeon had on the way realized she had forgotten her contact lenses. Overall all things that would not have been too dramatic and bad in any other situation but with Siyeon already stressed from the screaming thoughts in her mind it was enough to nearly push her over the edge.

Then the interview itself came. The interviewers overall seemed nice enough and she easily fell into the act, playing along with the jokes and simply tried to enjoy herself as they guessed the foreign snacks lying before them. And yet it was getting harder than ever to ignore the one sitting next to her. Over and over she caught herself staring at Bora, simply watching her as she spoke and joked, the charisma and happy energy simply oozing off of her, addicting to anyone close enough to experience it. Siyeon was entranced by her lips hanging onto every single sound and word falling off of them. 

The highlight of the interview came, the male announcer excitedly explaining the rules and it seemed fun enough. It was a standard game that would surely result in funny and chaotic memories knowing how much her friends loved annoying each other.

"Who do you want to play with?"

Siyeon was preoccupied with hugging Gahyeon's arm still, more than content to sit this one out and watch two of the others play. She wasn't too in the mood either way.

"Siyeon."

Of course, the voice she knew so well spoke up. Of course, her name rolled off her lips in that one tone somehow only Bora could ever pronounce. It really wasn't any different and yet to Siyeon made all the difference, her eyes following the curve of Bora's lips almost in slow-motion. The suddenly appearing hand in front of her eyes, Bora having gestured towards her, broke the spell. She stood up, nervous as she was excited and giddy she couldn't quite stop herself, moments like this the only times she would truly allow herself to play into her feelings for the other. Knowing she'd have the excuse of the camera she playfully surged forward, faking a nip towards Bora's lips as the other brought her hand up to protect her mouth, grinning all the while. In moments like this, Siyeon told herself there was more behind Bora's reciprocated tease, that maybe, just maybe, she wasn't the only one with a secret buried deep within her chest and the most unreadable script on tear-splattered pages of her diary. 

Her hand automatically followed the well-known movements, her fist shaking back and forth three times until she released it in a flat, tensed form resembling the shape of paper. Bora had chosen the scissors, winning the game. She would go first. Before Siyeon had any time to spiral further into her thoughts Bora reacted to her win, squealing happily and pulling a grimace that in turn pulled at all the right strings to have Siyeon grin back at her, her heart feeling so extremely full of happiness. 

If she could she would spend the rest of her life like this, simply watching Bora play around and be happy. Not even singing made her smile as much as seeing the other woman's pearly teeth whenever the corners of her lips would seemingly stretch over to her ears with how widely she grinned. She had fallen in love with that sight the first time she had been blessed enough to see it. Had perhaps fallen in love with it even more when she knew she was the cause of it, standing up just the slightest bit straighter at the pride she felt seeing the reaction she caused. 

She saw Bora's lips move before any sound registered in her brain.

"You want to play the Pepero game with me again, don't you?"

Siyeon automatically licked her lip, seemingly both felt and tasted the drop of blood from the bite-wound Bora had caused back then. Of course, she wanted to play it again, not the game itself as much as she wanted to repeat the kiss. Kiss Bora for real, feel her lips against her own, and coexist in the same space. Just, love her. Maybe she didn't just imagine the hopeful glint in Bora's eyes, the slight tremble of her lips as Siyeon imagined she felt their gaze on the same spot she had just grazed over with her tongue. Maybe she wasn't the only one with that moment on repeat in her mind, even months, years, later.

Noticing the red blinking dot of the camera to her right she nodded, remembering the game, and triumphantly threw a fist into the air. She hoped, prayed, that Bora would read the underlying message, would somehow be able to magically understand her thoughts and know.

"Of course!"

Even if she didn't, the loud laugh erupting from Bora was more than enough for Siyeon. If Bora's smile was all she'd want to see for the rest of her life her laugh was the music occupying her every thought.

"So easy," Siyeon smiled into the camera, doing her best to force her brain to focus on her surroundings and not just Bora, "Way too easy!"

It didn't work too well, her heart once more doing a flip as she watched Bora clap her hands in pure joy at the game. Now it was Siyeon’s turn to come up with something. She had spent the entire evening staring at Bora, focusing on her lips more often than not, and with the refreshed memory of their accidental kiss she couldn't not bring it up too. Bora had done so first after all. She really had all the excuses to do it too. And maybe she just wanted to hear Bora answer, even if it was a game forcing everyone to reply with 'of course'.

"Unnie," Siyeon trailed off, suddenly growing shy even with all the confidence she had mustered in her mind.

Bora, being Bora and not one for patience in situations like this, took her by the shoulders, exclaiming scandalized as she shook her, grinning and waiting for Siyeon to pose her question. Siyeon nearly imagined the hopeful glint to still be there, idly sitting in Bora's warm eyes. Looking at her through nearly closed lashes and still grinning from having her entire body shook back and forth, Siyeon choked out the question between sputters of laughter, holding onto the hands holding her shoulders, waiting.

"Unnie, you want to bite my lips again, don't you?"

This time she knew she saw Bora's eyes glide to her lips and knew that the memory played in her mind from the way her fingers tightened around the soft material of Siyeon's shirt.

"Of course!"

For anyone else it might have sounded the same as always, Bora's high-pitched laughter cutting through her words as the host as well as their members ushered them apart, screaming and laughing about their seemingly inappropriate interactions and questions. But Siyeon heard the quiver in her voice, the smallest uncertainty that didn't necessarily stem from negative thoughts but rather unresolved emotions and feelings. She didn't really have the time to question it, Gahyeon swiftly pulling her back down next to her and teasingly rolling her eyes at their antics. 

Everything after was a blur, momentary pictures sharp in-between a fog that contained nothing but her heart screaming to lean over and kiss Bora even as Bora's uncertainty infected her too, unanswered questions and fears once more taking over her mind. Suddenly the lighthearted game bringing Siyeon her favourite sight and most happy feeling had resulted in her once more falling into that endless pit of doubt that would suck her in deeper the more she visited it.

Gahyeon nudged her, the youngest's sharp elbow finding its home in the soft skin between Siyeon's ribs and hip having noticed the increasing frown between her brows and downturn of the corners of her lips. Siyeon’s face scrunched in discomfort at the rather strong hit but remembering the camera recording in front of them quickly used the opportunity to retaliate and ruffled Gahyeon's hair. Anything to hide her more than obvious stares aimed towards Bora. 

Later she'd thank Gahyeon. And she would probably, as so often, end up being the one with the best advice.

Siyeon more or less managed to control herself after that. Things went smoothly. They all teased about the comeback and teased each other and simply enjoyed their time as they always would. And for a while, Siyeon truly immersed herself in the act, forgot she was on a stage, and simply enjoyed the time she spent with the people most important to her. She almost managed to forget the game, forget Bora's eyes as they bore themselves into her own, how they had lingered on her lips for way longer than usual, how she could've sworn she'd seen Bora nervously gulp as she herself had leaned closer during their flirting. 

Almost.

All too soon she found herself back in the company's car, huddled into one of the big seats, more blanket and jacket than human. Warm air blew from the air conditioning and even through the many layers of cloth covering her she could feel the seat beneath her emitting heat from the there installed heating pad. Had her mind not been so loud, her memories replaying before her eyes not so vivid, Bora's perfume and overall presence not so strong on her senses she may have allowed herself to be lulled to a night of short, soft sleep. Moments like these were rare and oddly enough, more restful than many a night spent at the dorm. Minji often blamed it on their full bellies and utterly exhausted bodies craving the gentle rocking and peaceful existence of those nightly car-rides.

Maybe it was the fumes of their manager's minty gum getting to her head, maybe it was the sleep-deprived 5am state-of-mind or maybe it was simply her desperate and lovesick self yearning for answers and warmth that got her to break the quiet hum and otherworldly aura surrounding them. 

"Did you mean it?"

Bora hummed in confusion, leaning closer to Siyeon as the car rolled down the street. The nightly sky slowly gained its pinks and reds, the sun already beginning to rise in the early morning hours. Siyeon actively saw the cogs in Bora's head turning as she tried to untangle and make sense of her question before ultimately giving up and merely nodding semi-dismissively, not quite being awake enough for any type of conversation. And yet, even seeing this, Siyeon couldn't hold herself back, the question having burned on the back of her throat since the first time Bora had passingly joked about continuously remembering the taste of Siyeon's lips when she had mentioned watching the video capturing that one fateful memory every other night before going to sleep. Siyeon had never quite understood how Bora claimed it would calm her down when for her the video, the pure memory itself, would cause her heart to beat twice as fast and heat as well as shivers to rise in every single corner of her being.  
She bit her lip, ignoring the all too familiar iron taste, and pressed on.

"About the Pepero game. You keep bringing up the game and I just," Siyeon broke off, realizing how she could barely hold the figurative wave of emotions back any longer and decided to backtrack, once again, pushing the conversation over to a future, hopefully, braver Siyeon, "Never mind. We'll talk some other time. Sleep."

She didn't notice how her sigh, a small, defeated and exhausted noise, caused a faint frown to appear between Bora's brows, the soft skin on her forehead creasing. She didn't notice how Bora welcomed the chance to skip the talk, for now, the feelings in her chest too messy and raw to be put into words this quickly and on the spot, and the fears in the back of her head too prevalent to allow her much space to breathe even when she ached in pain at seeing Siyeon so obviously distraught about what she presumed to be the same topic as her.

What Siyeon did notice was the familiar warmth she found in her palm, Bora's body having had a mind of its own, searching to comfort her soul with Siyeon the same way Siyeon's often would with her. Her eyes zoned in closer, watching how Bora's fingers closed in around hers, strong and assuring as they always were, Bora's thumb tracing small, tight circles on the knuckle it had landed on. Siyeon was glad Bora had reached out for her hand.

"I love you, Singnie."

It was whispered into the crook of Siyeon's neck, Bora's nose pressing near the space where the last letter of Siyeon's tattoo ended, and even with the number of times it had been said in the same way before, both felt the underlying weight, the truth behind it. The pain, too.

"I'll always love you, Bora."

Neither of them mentioned the hot tear meeting Siyeon's skin, the little hairs on its way down her neck raising as she shivered the slightest bit.


	2. two

Weeks passed and nothing happened but near everything changed. If it wasn't for the memory of Bora's tear's trail engraved into her skin she probably would've managed to convince herself that the moment in the car had been one of those hallucinations one sometimes had when pushed past the limits of just exhaustion. Life had just gone on the same, time slowly trickling down even as she, now more than ever before, seemingly got stuck in place in the past. It was exhausting. Five years' worth of fighting herself every waking moment seemingly went down the drain the second that darned game had been mentioned again. And again. And again. 

Siyeon stared at the screen of her phone, thumb rhythmically tapping the small heart-shaped button in the corner of her screen as she watched the livestream, attentively following her friends' stories. She tried to, at least, her attention mostly being commanded by the one sitting in the middle, gesturing around wildly as she told of one time the three of them had gone to watch a movie together. Bora's energy was addictive, always was, and Siyeon found herself smiling along just as Gahyeon and Handong did on her phone’s screen. 

She had missed listening to her. They had barely spoken more than a dozen words since that day in the car. Mostly because of Siyeon hiding away whenever the other would try initiating a conversation. She was too ashamed of herself, too scared, to dare look Bora in the eyes again. Every time she saw her she could seemingly feel the piece of paper taped to her forehead, screaming 'I am in love with you in the gay way!' so she instead took the coward’s route and fled. 

It was easier. 

It hurt. 

More than gulping down her feelings probably would. And she missed Bora. And selfish as she was, she wasn't able to fully go through with avoiding her completely. She would hide whenever Bora approached her but still somehow needed to see and hear her, bask in her presence. For that, even the small, dirty screen in her hands was enough. Somewhat.

She kept staring at the screen, almost feeling like a creep for how much she focused on Bora’s features, tracing every single line painting her face with her eyes. Over and over her gaze would land on the pair of lips she from experience knew were the softest to exist. At some point her left hand left her phone entirely, brushing over her own lower lip as she still stared on. 

A year had passed and somehow she was still obsessed over that one memory that with every day became less clear. She barely even remembered the actual moment, the feeling. Her thumb brushed over the place that had sported the small bite-wound and instead of remembering her own thoughts and impression all she remembered was the picture from the interview’s recording. She lived her own memory through someone else’s lens.

As so often her and Bora’s minds seemed connected. Bora looked straight into the camera mid-sentence and Siyeon felt herself freeze. For a moment they stayed like that, almost as if Bora knew she was watching, had felt her eyes through the screen before she turned and playfully pushed Handong in retaliation for a joke Siyeon hadn’t heard. 

The seven spirits weren’t on Siyeon’s side this day as Bora, out of nowhere, read a comment left on the livestream, “Ah, Pepero! I enjoyed the game last time!”

Siyeon was left blinking with her mouth agape. Bora continued.

“But now I can only think of one thing with Pepero, I can only think about playing with Siyeon!”

Siyeon faintly noticed movement to Bora’s left, Handong covering her mouth after her jaw had seemingly fallen to the floor in shock. It was a feeling Siyeon could understand well, her own left hand covering her mouth so she wouldn’t squeal in surprise.

“Dong and I had such a big portion of the Pepero stick left,” Gahyeon laughed, remembering her own turn.

Bora smirked, ignoring Handong and Gahyeon’s brief conversation about their experience with the game. Siyeon only had eyes for her, too.

“I really want to play again.”

Of course, Bora would say that. Their eyes met through the screen once more and at this point, Siyeon was convinced Bora somehow knew she was watching. Even though she didn’t quite know what to make of it.

“Who do you want to play with?” Handong asked, a sly grin on her lips in the same moment Gahyeon yelled out a loud and scandalized “With who?”.

Not allowing Bora the chance to answer both Handong and Gahyeon grimaced, the youngest of the three using the perfect opportunity to poke fun at Bora, joking the older should just play with the wall if she wanted to this much. Bora just raised a simple brow. Siyeon was glued to the screen, eagerly awaiting what she would reply, noticing the tell-tale signs of Bora’s retort bubbling up inside of her. She couldn’t help her curiosity on the topic. 

“Fine I’ll just play by myself,” Bora pouted.

Siyeon didn't believe that to be the actual thing Bora had planned to say.

“Pathetic.”

Hadong’s dry comment caused everyone to burst into laughter.

Bora laughed and in her room tears collected at Siyeon's lashes, threatening to fall the more the clear sound came through the white earbuds firmly sitting in her ears. Her thumb left the hearts once more, tracing Bora's pixelated features with her nail instead. The fun and excitement had left her as quickly as it had appeared. She hated herself for what she felt, for how she immediately had hoped for Bora to mention her name. It was such a stupid game that had taken place in an interview of all places and yet Siyeon doubted it would ever leave her mind. She hated choosing to distance herself and hated herself for causing Bora's laughter to sound less bright and carefree than it usually did. 

A tear dropped onto the screen, blurring Bora's small smile into an unidentifiable mess. A second one joined, then a third. Siyeon let her phone drop into her lap, still listening to Bora's voice as she continued retelling the story. She buried her face in her knees, crouching over and hugging herself with her arms as she listened to the voice of the person she most loved and most hurt. One of the earbuds loosened and fell out from the motion, her left ear now picking up Bora's real voice through the wall. 

How easy it would be for Siyeon to walk out of her room and join the three of them. But she didn't. She didn't have the right to.

Instead, she choked down her sobs, picked the earbud up with trembling fingers, and put it back so she would be able to listen with both ears again. Her mind was so distraught she only heard the sounds themselves, the calming tone, and didn't actually understand the words spoken. But she also didn't care. She just wanted Bora close. In whatever way possible.

It took a while but eventually her tears dried and already quiet sobs grew even quieter and with a deep breath and wipe of her eyes she picked her phone back up, leaning back to fully lie down on the bed. Everything felt wrong, the usually soft mattress pressing into her back in uncomfortable places and no matter how much she turned from left to right she just wouldn't find a comfortable position. She gave up, accepted the painful press near her shoulder blade, and simply hugged her blanket close, circling it with her arms and in a deep, hidden corner of her mind pretended it was the warmth of someone else. 

Exhaustion pulled at her and she gave in halfway, closing one eye and still watching the now too bright screen. Handong poked fun at Bora and all three of them broke into loud, screaming laughter. The corner of Siyeon's mouth flew up on its own. 

Her family never failed to lift her spirits. Siyeon couldn't help the sadness resurfacing. Bora never failed to lift her spirits even if she was the topic of all of Siyeon's guilt.

She closed her eyes, pulled a small wolf-plush Bora had gifted her a few months ago between her chin and the bunched up blanket, and allowed her mind to rest by succumbing to the sweet fingers of sleep.

Sleep didn't last long and the second Yubin burst into their shared room she woke up from her nap. The other woman immediately apologized, not having known Siyeon to be sleeping in the middle of the day. Siyeon just waved her off, putting a small grin on her face as she tried to joke about the nap. It was obvious Yubin didn't quite buy into her distraction, her eyes more than likely still red and puffy from her crying session and the day's makeup imprinted onto her blanket more than her face. She must have looked like a mess judging by Yubin's raised brow.

"Everything will be fine," Yubin calmly spoke and sat down next to Siyeon, gently patting her head, "I don't quite know what goes on but I'm sure it will be alright."

"I hope so, too," Siyeon whispered, her voice not completely awake yet.

Somehow having Yubin comforting her made her feel even worse.

“Stop.”

Minji had entered the room without Siyeon noticing. She and Yubin both looked up to the leader, anxiously and curiously waiting for her words. Minji sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose with one hand while the other lay on her hip. Siyeon felt like she was twelve once more, her mother staring her down with tired yet warm and compassionate eyes whenever she had done something wrong. Like cooking noodles in the water boiler.

"Stop torturing yourself."

Siyeon closed her eyes and turned to the other side, Yubin's warm hand falling from her hair as she visibly turned her back to them. She wasn't torturing herself. She wasn't. Really.

"I can hear you thinking and I don't care how long you're gonna mope but I won't let you feel or think you're alone."

Siyeon heard cloth shift behind her, the mattress bouncing slightly when Yubin stood up to make space for Minji. She didn't understand the whispers shared between the other two but figured they had come to some sort of agreement, Yubin leaving a last small pat on Siyeon’s head, brushing some of the hair that had fallen over her eyes away, before leaving the room. Minji’s hand quickly replaced Yubin’s before the entirety of her warmth surrounded Siyeon. She didn’t resist and instead pressed herself closer against Minji, allowing herself to be held the same way the leader always had. Siyeon had spent more hours than she could or would count in this exact same position. Probably would many more.

“Talk to me.”

It almost sounded like an order and Siyeon couldn’t help the choked laugh escaping her. Minji knew her, knew she would simply lie down still and cry in silence, digging the guilt deeper into herself instead of actually dealing with it. She scrunched her nose, feeling the wetness from her tears and the snot when she wiped it. For a moment she felt disgusted at herself, the state she was in, and how Minji, looking as put together as always, once again had to deal with her. But feeling her soft hands on her cheek, thumb wiping away the last stray tears she ignored the wet icky on her palm and turned to bury her head in Minji’s chest, welcoming the comforting dark and warmth.

“I’m scared,” she stated the obvious.

“Why?”

“I don’t know.” She knew. She grabbed a fistful of Minji’s sweater and pulled herself even closer, feeling Minji’s strong arms hug her tighter. “I don’t want to lose her. This. Everything.”

“You won’t.”

“How could you possibly know?”

“I know a lot.” Siyeon didn’t see her wink but knowing Minji was more than sure it had accompanied her words.

“I love her so much. But I’m also so scared. I want nothing more than to hug and kiss her but also want to run to the other side of the world the second I see her. It’s so stupid.”

Something bumped into the crown of Siyeon’s head and from the sound, Siyeon assumed Minji had pressed a kiss against her hair.

“She likes you.”

“Not like this.”

“Trust me.”

The tears were coming back, dread settling in the pit of her stomach at the thought of having that talk with Bora. Minji simply kept hugging her until she calmed down, an hour, maybe two had passed. Yoohyeon had briefly stuck her head into the room, quietly asking the two what they would want for dinner before leaving again. Yoohyeon coming instead of Bora like usual had brought Siyeon to tears yet again. And Minji had stayed with her, offering constant comfort and understanding. 

Eventually, she had crawled out of her personal fort made up of Minji, her blanket, and the small plush she would protect with her life. The kitchen’s bright light blinded her when she entered, space now empty as the others had finished eating already. And Minji, even though Siyeon had continuously heard her stomach growling in protest, had chosen to go accompany the two youngest while they were watching TV, her hand already buried in the bowl of popcorn they had made themselves. Siyeon almost wanted to scold her for skipping actual food but a fleeting look in the mirror reminded her of the state she was in and how she hadn’t eaten anything in a day. She really was the last one able to scold Minji for that.

With her eyes, half-closed Siyeon stumbled through the kitchen. Even with her pair of glasses for once sitting on her nose instead of some lone corner on her room’s windowsill her surroundings were blurry from both the sleep and amount of time she had spent crying. Her hip knocked into something and after looking down and cautiously patting the object with her hands she concluded one of the others must have forgotten to put the chair back. Groaning softly she pushed it back, the screech of the rubber cap on the bottom of its legs scraping against their floor causing her to grimace. She was anything but awake enough for that.

When she reached her designated spot at the table she once again felt the lingering sadness resurface, the single plate sitting there filled with the meal Bora had cooked, arranged prettily, and covered with a plastic bowl to keep the dust away. Siyeon smiled at her plate sadly and picked it up, balancing it on one hand and slowly walking over to their microwave to reheat the meal. She had eaten alone often enough, it wasn’t a new experience. But the knowledge of Bora taking her time to arrange everything for her, even going the extra step to covering her food, while she had done everything possible to avoid her for the past weeks nearly had her spiraling back.

The microwave's bell rang, announcing her food had warmed up, and soon enough she was ready to sit down to eat finally. Only something to drink was missing.

“Hi.”

The glass of water she had lifted to her lips found its way back onto the kitchen counter. Siyeon grabbed onto the granite, her grip growing tighter the closer Bora’s feathery steps sounded. She wasn’t quite ready to face her yet. Not after today.

“I miss you.”

Bora’s voice sounded broken, her small body circling Siyeon’s from behind, her cheek pressed against Siyeon’s shoulder blade. Remembering Minji’s words, Siyeon collected all her courage, biting the rising panic down, and turned around to properly pull Bora into her arms.

“Hey,” Siyeon whispered into Bora's hair.

“Please don’t run.”

A small, impossibly familiar hand found Siyeon’s cheek, holding her gently, and when Siyeon gazed down, slowly moving her thumb to stroke her smooth skin. Bora raised her other hand to Siyeon’s head, too, rooting her in place. It felt too intimate, too raw, and Siyeon didn’t know where to look. She kept switching between Bora’s unreadable eyes and the red painting her lips.

“Please don’t run again.”

The gap between them closed, even more, their noses and foreheads touching as Bora held onto her as if scared Siyeon would dissolve into nothingness in her grasp.


End file.
